There are two kinds of people in the world who love truth: children, and those who want liberation from narcissistic abuse. If you are the latter, this video is for you. Update: Upon reading this post, one of our readers, Will Mathes, commented: “I’d like to add to this list: people who are truly ‘done’/who’ve … More For the Love of Truth – Liberation from Narcissistic Abuse
Last night, a friend of mine who was feeling GREAT just a few days ago emailed to let me know she was feeling DOWN in the dumps. It was very late, so I asked her if she’d like me to send her some poems/vignettes I’d written recently. She welcomed the idea and afterwards she let … More Trust the sunshine in your body to eliminate the black clouds in your brain – taking risks for joy after narcissistic abuse
These days, when someone asks for my help because they’re feeling perplexed, confused, distracted, “dilemma’d”, the next thing I listen for is if they’ve just experienced communication with a narcissist (or someone who’s part of the nark’s web) . . . IF the answer is “yes,” . . . THEN the communication pattern becomes the … More Have you been Narcissized? Seven affirmations for breaking the trauma bond.
When rage has nowhere to go Because a bully has you hiding in fear Shame grows. When hidden rage is strong Shame deepens. Your light hides with it. Deeper. And then . . . Someone comes along and meets you At the depths Validates the hidden shameful experience And says, “Hello. You’re safe now. I … More Validation, Depths of Healing, Freedom Within, 2019
Feeling safe with others who honor our authentic experience is the heartbeat of a joyful life. In such relationships, essential simplicity is a way of being. On the other hand, grandiosity and fear of being ordinary are the mainstays of a narcissistic personality. Constant complexity is the order of the day. Shame and fear are … More Healing collective narcissism – thoughts on healthy anger, grief, intimidation and honoring our most basic experiences
Let’s contemplate the idea of seeing narcissistic abuse as a magic trick, a hypnotic sleight of hand. Here are a couple of movie examples for you to consider: In Aladdin, Jafar the nark is sooo tall, looming over the sultan, who is sooo small in comparison. Jafar uses his snakey staff to hypnotize the sultan … More Beat the Nark – break the spell with Marty McFly and Aladdin – healing from narcissistic abuse
I wasn’t born to be anyone’s lighting, to turn toward them constantly for the purpose of highlighting their grandiosity. I like giving to my friends. My undivided Attention. Affection. Energy. Emotion. These are priceless gifts. I love giving these gifts and receiving them. But, like most people, I don’t enjoy giving them to people who … More No one likes being forced to share. #communism #narcissism
Bottom line: A narcissistic personality is one that experiences a core shame and then creates a distorted grandiose image in order to avoid the shame (doth thou protest too much, eh?). In order to maintain their image and avoid their pain (and because shame is a relational experience), a narky nark needs others to … More What the narcissist is really saying and what you can do about it.
That depends. On whether they are honored or shamed. Whether they are treated with loyalty or betrayal. Whether they are welcomed with your presence or rejected through your absence. Tune in. Today. Right now. This moment. You Know Where They Go. Shhh… listen within… I’ll say more in a future blog post. For now, take … More Where do all the feelings go? (Part I)
(If you received 2 blog posts from me in your email today and the first link isn’t working, it’s because it was replaced with this one… sorry about any confusion!) A close friend of mine has a hubby who designs spaces like a bad-ass mofo. He says that of the 6 key design elements (scale, size, … More Rage and Anger, Perspective and Scale. A Design Technique that can Help You Heal from the Effects of Narcissistic Abuse