(Please scroll down to see the collection of articles)
I’ve discovered something important after 2 years of leading people through the Joy-Based Living practices.
Although our JBL community is for anyone who is sincerely seeking more joy in their lives, there is one type of person who uniquely benefits from the coaching and support system that our community provides: someone who is healing from the effects of narcissistic abuse.
Now that I think about it, this makes perfect sense.
At the heart of narcissistic abuse is invalidation of the self and of a person’s reality.
So, when a person’s self-hood is seen, honored, accepted, appreciated and even celebrated (as we practice in our JBL community), and when that person’s reality and experience is VALIDATED… that person finally has an opportunity to thrive. Their joy has the potential to come fully alive.
Many people who are healing from narcissistic abuse feel alone, isolated, depressed, and even a little crazy. It’s precisely how they were manipulated to feel.
But, to be clear, they weren’t manipulated because they are weak. Quite the contrary: they were targeted by the narcissist because they are strong. What the narcissist is looking for is someone who will take care of them, at the expense of their own needs. They are looking for someone who is empathic, compassionate, giving and caring. To a fault.
The person who is abused is called a co-narcissist. Imagine in your mind being someone’s co-pilot. You’re not so afraid of being alone. But you are afraid of going “against” the narcissist’s perceptions and wishes. And you have every reason to feel afraid. Your personhood has been threatened (as well as other important areas of your life… physical, emotional, financial, children, etc.).
A narcissistic relationship is like a toxic dance that feels hypnotic. If it’s not healed, the chances of attracting other narcissists to your life are extremely high.
If this describes you, and you are interested in healing and thriving, we have 2 paths that you can take depending on your readiness level and what you can afford at this time.
- Step by step. Here you’ll begin with self-study. Buy the 12 Practices E-book (read it; watch the videos, which are included; do the journal). Then share your Practices with others in our community. Then take the Wholehearted Mastermind course. Then join our Authentic Connections conversation. Each of these steps is meaningful and important. It will be up to you to stay motivated to take each step.
- Immersion: 6-month one-on-one coaching intensive. You’ll receive 12 coaching sessions plus you’ll be personally guided through the 12 Practices e-book, the community conversation, the Wholehearted Mastermind course and the Authentic Connections conversation. To get started, you’ll want to purchase one session. During that time, we will assess your current situation and your current needs. We will create a plan of action for you with a few short term action steps. We will also use this time to see if we would be a good fit for each other to work together for 6 months.
At Joy-Based Living, we learn to regulate our emotions with extreme self-care and embodiment of honor, commitment and loyalty toward ourselves and others. We also practice celebrating our imperfections as we step forward. We value our most authentic desires, and this includes taking the risks to make our dreams come true in the world. We learn to give and receive support as we increase our well-being and joy.
Here is our collection of articles about healing from, and thriving after, narcissistic abuse (newest first):
- Reciprocity, Emotional Abandonment, and Healing CPTSR CPTSD codependency #emotionalrainbow #print
- 90 seconds – heal cptsr, cptsd, codependency – trade flags for waves
- Celebrate your courage (healing cptsr, CPTSD, codependency)
- Shame vs toxic shame (healing cptsr, CPTSD, codependency)
- 3 levels of relationship stuckness – and how to get unstuck
- 3 levels of stuck – get traction for taking inspired action – #cptsr #cptsd #codependency
- Prayer, possibility and the power of love #CPTSR #CPTSD #codependency
- Toxic Passivity? I don’t think so! – Response to Richard Grannon #CPTSR #CPTSD #codependency
- What are your core values? (Heal CPTSR, CPTSD, codependency)
- Love letter to co-narcissists #healing #CPTSR #CPTSD #codependency
- Path out of hell – CPTSR CPTSD Codependency – 12 Practices – Progress Not Perfection
- I See God in You – Movie Therapy #RabNeBanaDiJodi #CPTSD #CPTSR #codependency
- Eliminate toxic guilt and shame #notyourburden #cptsr #cptsd #codependency
- (F-Bomb) How to find healthy relationships #CPTSR #CPTSD #Codependency
- A prayer for surrendering feelings of powerlessness, let them be replaced with love
- George Carlin on PTSD – 2 min funny man rant
- The harm of indifference and the healing power of love #cptsr #cptsd #codependency
- Emotional neglect and abandonment #healing #PeteWalker #CPTSR #CPTSD #codependency
- Audio of Hey, your neediness is showing! (Worst thing imaginable to say to someone with codependency issues)
- Heal CPTSR with Mindfulness – special considerations #David Hawkins #CPTSD #codependency #teatime
- CPTSR welcome video
- Visibility and Codependency – A Course in Miracles and Tradition 12 #healing #grace #CPTSD #CPTSR
- Rehab for Codependency Part 2 – power moves #cptsd #cptsr #teatime #chocolate
- How self-abandonment perpetuates unhealthy leadership #quickrant #teatime
- When people you love suffer – What to do #recap #codependency #cptsd #cptsr #teatime #playlist
- How to heal inner blame. #trauma #CPTSD #codependency #teatime #PeteWalker
- Rehab for codependency Part 1, toxic shame and guilt O JOY! #cptsd #cptsr #teatime Lidja Rangelovska, Sam Vaknin
- Lingo for Freedom from Trauma #Eddie Izzard #teatime #codependency #cptsd #cptsr #healtoxicshame
- 2 main lies that keep codependents stuck – and what to do about it (teatime, cptsd, cptsr) – Disney villains, treasure cove
- When championing yourself triggers trauma #triumph #TEATIME #codependency #CPTSD #CPTSR – every #Coach #Therapist #Healer should know this
- Stop Damming It. Tears can magically transmute trauma. 11 reasons we hold them back. (Codependency, CPTSD, CPTSR)
- Spotlight What’s Right: JOY-POWER
- Launching TEA TIME! Victimized to Victorious! (codependency, CPTSD/CPTSR)
- 3 questions to ask yourself to determine the severity of your post traumatic stress
- Dear Friend, Your advice was great – but there’s a tyrant in my brain (codependency/ CPTSD/ CPTSR/ emotional abuse)
- Setting Manifestation FREE After CPTSD (codependency/ CPTSR/ emotional abuse)
- Hey, your neediness is showing! (Worst thing imaginable to say to someone with codependency issues)
- Key to Self-Care and Jonathan Debut!
- Say Goodbye to Beasts of Burden – Yippee-Ki-yay! (codependency, CPTSD, CPTSR)
- Emotional neglect or abandonment – name it so you can tame it (CPTSD/ CPTSR)
- The Big Love in Me and in You – with quote by Louise Hay
- Connection (Part 3) Social Media and Being Part of the Solution
- Connection (Part 2)
- Trauma – a personal note from me
- Trolls – 56 second message
- when abuse is invisible
- Brene Brown Kicks Ass on Netflix – say adios to critics and trolls – GO GIRL!
- If trauma narrows our vision, does ambition widen it?
- From Powerblind to Running Free (poster)
- Goldilocks and the 3 Levels of Power