The Art of Boundary-making and Disengagement

Coach dejoly

One of the arts that is rarely spoken about, yet we bump up against it all the time, is boundary making and how to not get caught up in our own or other people’s negativity or chaos. Our bodies react in certain situations with clinched fists, heart palpitations, rigidity in the back, tight throat and other ailments that we don’t attribute to poor boundary setting, yet are absolutely a result. Things like ulcers, addictions and diabetes.

We can often hear ourselves say, “I thought I was pretty clear with him about not liking his behavior, but he did it anyway.” Or, “Why can’t I decide what to do with my life?” And we really are sincere about not understanding why these things keep coming up in our lives.

For a lot of us, our childhood training, either spoken or implied, told us that we didn’t have the right to set…

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