I never imagined I’d be so energized (and even excited) about discussing this topic of healing from narcissistic abuse. Seriously. Since 2009, after learning that that’s what I was dealing with, I just never wanted to hear the narky nark word again. Sheesh! It’s still hard to spell!
You want to know what I think SUCKS MOST in this particular healing process?
In order to cut the ties of the abuse, guess you have to study? The narky nark… The spotlight is ON THEM, they get to come FIRST, yet again! It can be maddening!
In healing from narcissistic abuse, in order to get to the “how to / what to do for yourself” part, you have to study the cult-like “dynamic” first.
The narcissist (similar to a cult leader) is the one who’s been leading the dance, pulling the puppet strings, piloting the plane. You’ve been compulsively taking the lead, letting your strings be pulled, co-piloting the plane.
If you’ve been conditioned to live with this programming that causes you to automatically cover-up your authentic radiance: Who are you without the narcissist?
Do you even know?
Untangling from this mess can be like removing yourself from a giant spider web of really sticky string. And if that’s where you have lived for most or all of your life (even if it was just “part” of your life, if you had this kind of secret to keep, it will still run in the background like old bad software until it’s disabled), YOU will have to face the music, untangle yourself, and then figure out who the hell you are as your own pilot, your own master, and the lead dancer of your life.
I want to get funny about this topic and actually make you laugh. I don’t think I’m there yet, but that’s my aim. Anger is here right now. Up and out.
Taking the reins back and shaping your identity from the inside out takes time, education, healing and support. WE are so worth it. That’s why I’m taking the time and energy to write these posts. What excites me most is liberation. Yours and mine. Living free. Free to shape our lives as we choose. With joy. with authentic spontaneity, with love. Real love.
Thanks for listening to me rant.