Tag: healing

Trust the sunshine in your body to eliminate the black clouds in your brain – taking risks for joy after narcissistic abuse

January 11, 2019

Last night, a friend of mine who was feeling GREAT just a few days ago emailed to let me know she was feeling DOWN in the dumps. It was very late, so I asked her if she’d like me to send her some poems/vignettes I’d written recently. She welcomed the idea and afterwards she let … More Trust the sunshine in your body to eliminate the black clouds in your brain – taking risks for joy after narcissistic abuse

Have you been Narcissized? Seven affirmations for breaking the trauma bond.

January 7, 2019

This blog post continually receives a large number of views, so I felt compelled to add this update on Jan 18, 2020. I have been on a search for you to refer you to someone who can support you in healing CPTSR/ CPTSD – someone who knows their stuff, is friendly and professional, and is … More Have you been Narcissized? Seven affirmations for breaking the trauma bond.

Validation, Depths of Healing, Freedom Within, 2019

December 31, 2018

When rage has nowhere to go Because a bully has you hiding in fear Shame grows. When hidden rage is strong Shame deepens. Your light hides with it. Deeper. And then . . . Someone comes along and meets you At the depths Validates the hidden shameful experience And says, “Hello. You’re safe now. I … More Validation, Depths of Healing, Freedom Within, 2019

Healing collective narcissism – thoughts on healthy anger, grief, intimidation and honoring our most basic experiences

December 30, 2018

Feeling safe with others who honor our authentic experience is the heartbeat of a joyful life. In such relationships, essential simplicity is a way of being. On the other hand, grandiosity and fear of being ordinary are the mainstays of a narcissistic personality. Constant complexity is the order of the day. Shame and fear are … More Healing collective narcissism – thoughts on healthy anger, grief, intimidation and honoring our most basic experiences

Beat the Nark – break the spell with Marty McFly and Aladdin – healing from narcissistic abuse

December 29, 2018

Let’s contemplate the idea of seeing narcissistic abuse as a magic trick, a hypnotic sleight of hand. Here are a couple of movie examples for you to consider: In Aladdin, Jafar the nark is sooo tall, looming over the sultan, who is sooo small in comparison. Jafar uses his snakey staff to hypnotize the sultan … More Beat the Nark – break the spell with Marty McFly and Aladdin – healing from narcissistic abuse

No one likes being forced to share. #communism #narcissism

December 21, 2018

I wasn’t born to be anyone’s lighting, to turn toward them constantly for the purpose of highlighting their grandiosity. I like giving to my friends. My undivided Attention. Affection. Energy. Emotion. These are priceless gifts. I love giving these gifts and receiving them. But, like most people, I don’t enjoy giving them to people who … More No one likes being forced to share. #communism #narcissism

What the narcissist is really saying and what you can do about it.

December 16, 2018

  Bottom line: A narcissistic personality is one that experiences a core shame and then creates a distorted grandiose image in order to avoid the shame (doth thou protest too much, eh?). In order to maintain their image and avoid their pain (and because shame is a relational experience), a narky nark needs others to … More What the narcissist is really saying and what you can do about it.

Rage and Anger, Perspective and Scale. A Design Technique that can Help You Heal from the Effects of Narcissistic Abuse

December 11, 2018

Update November 8 2020: I believe this post describes the an important reason for having a spiritual belief and practice. Aligning your energy and intention with the benevolent goodness of the Universe offers a true and deep feeling of security. As children, we automatically have faith in those bigger than us, our caregivers. As adults, … More Rage and Anger, Perspective and Scale. A Design Technique that can Help You Heal from the Effects of Narcissistic Abuse

In the aftermath of an episode – Healing from narcissistic abuse

December 10, 2018

In Part I of the Healing from Narcissistic Abuse series, I talked about the “Invisibility cloak” and the looks of “contempt and disdain” that the narky-nark flings at his or her target to keep them “in their place” and to keep the narky-nark feeling superior. Now, I’d like to name what happens inside the person … More In the aftermath of an episode – Healing from narcissistic abuse

Toxic Fumes (part 2 of 2) – You are the Treasure – Ending Procrastination – Healing Narcissistic Abuse

December 1, 2018

Part 1 of this post is here. WANT TO END PROCRASTINATION FOREVER ??? Procrastination doesn’t feel hazardous, which is why so many people let themselves get away with it. It’s like a deadly non-scented toxic fume. If you’re procrastinating on the activities that would generate the most joy (for yourself and those you love)… you’re … More Toxic Fumes (part 2 of 2) – You are the Treasure – Ending Procrastination – Healing Narcissistic Abuse