Paulina never mentions “narcissistic abuse” directly in this video (below), but it sounds like she’s been through some good therapy and I’m hoping she knows that what she is dealing with is Complex Post Traumatic Stress.
The signs are there: Her bewilderment and confusion. CHECK. Her feelings of abandonment and betrayal. CHECK. Her confession that he possessed her and that she liked that when she was younger. CHECK. His leaving her out of his will. CHECK.
I wasn’t planning on a narcissistic abuse post but this is such a crystal clear example of Complex PTSD. CPTSD is often undiagnosed or misdiagnosed which creates a much lengthier healing process and an increased likelihood of repeat-crappy-scenarios. Which is why CLEAR examples can be SO HELPFUL, not just for clients but for therapists as well.
With CPTSD, what you find underneath the anxiety, depression, confusion, rage, fear, betrayal is deep-seated and well-practiced self-abandonment and self-betrayal. It’s usually an inner voice that contradicts the expansion of your joy. What’s tricky is that often, this inner voice is pre-language. It’s an embodied sensation that diverts you from your true self. Recognizing it and dismantling it is required to take charge of yourself. And this may be completely new to a person, especially if the trauma is very old, as Paulina describes.
Paulina, you are beautiful. With and without makeup. I send you blessings, love and wish you so much grace.
If you want more information about CPTSD or narcissistic abuse, check out my e-book SANCTUARY. It’s free for now and you can get it here.
SANCTUARY is a gateway to liberation. You’ll get a good “big picture” for simplifying your understanding this stuff and you’ll get more resources. “HappyD’s intrepid glossary of psychological jargon” is worth the price of the whole book. Oh, yeah. It’s free. :-). For now.
Also, if you type CPTSD or CPTSR or codependency into the search bar at the footer of this website (www.joybasedliving.com), you’ll find a bunch of articles that I posted during a couple of years of intense research.
I wish you much love, emotional well-being and clarity on your path.
And grace. And joy.
Debbie Happy Cohen, author and coach, is also the founder of Joy-Based Living. Her Master’s Degree is in counseling, specializing in family systems, healing emotional trauma, and practical spirituality.
Also affectionately known as Happy D! and Reverend SASSY SHORTS!, she lives on Lookout Mountain in Alabama, near Chattanooga, Tennessee. Her books include Reach Your Stars!, SANCTUARY, It’s All About Kids: Every Child Deserves a Teacher of the Year, and I Don’t Think So! You can find her blogging at http://www.joybasedliving.com.